Never Once

I had hoped to post more regularly on the blog but my days are filled with shepherding (a.k.a. manage chaos :-) ) two kiddos whose lives have been turned upside down...and whom have turned our lives upside down.  :-)   I wake up each morning asking God for His grace and mercy to help our family move through this time of transition in a way that brings healing to Sammy and Bethlahym, that makes our hearts more like His and cause our family to wear the adoption banner well, for His glory.   These last few weeks have been H.A.R.D.  Harder than we could have imagined.  More exhausting than we could have imagined.  The greatest comfort we have is knowing that we are not doing this alone nor on our own strength. It is a good place to be...weaknesses exposed, His power revealed.   The best place? Yes!  An uncomfortable place?  Oh! Most definitely!  Regretful?  Not for a nano second.

A  few months ago, a sweet friend shared this song with me.  I have thought of it many times since then as it truly reflects this journey we are on.   I begin each day with the comfort that Never Once does He leave us and that each victory is His.

Never Once by Matt Redman

Through Samuel's Eyes

This morning I awoke to an overwhelming sight. Psalm 16 in the flesh. My son's first response to the dawning of the first day of his "new life" in a new family, in a new land. Samuel was lying in bed, silently staring out his bedroom at the South Dakota sunrise with a great wonder in his eyes. He had a quiet peace and full joy written on his face, in his eyes. I wondered if my "no longer orphaned son" was saying with the Psalmist, "the LORD is my chosen portion and my cup; you hold my lot. The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance." (Psalm 16:5-6 ESV)



My heart welled up with an inexpressible gratitude towards my Heavenly Father's goodness. He sovereignly provided the incredible gift of two more children through physical, earthly adoption. That He has chosen me to a new father again, but this time to the fatherless. He chose Samuel and Bethlahym's portion, their cup. It is very obvious over these past two years that God alone holds theirs and our lots. Today, Samuel's lines have fallen is very pleasant places. I saw it in his eyes, on his smile.



This morning God has shown me His love, for His children, in a way that I would have never known without the gift of this earthly adoption. As I watched Samuel's response to his first day, I prayed that God would give me that same wonder and amazement in His glorious grace today. That my perfect Father in Heaven has delightfully adopted me, as His child, at great cost to Himself. This morning, I saw new life that returned me once again to Jesus, my Life Giver and praise Him for His salvation.



Every day with Jesus is a an opportunity to be most satified, in my life, found only in Him. He is my joy, His is my peace, and Samuel's response to his first day reminds me of this much bigger, much greater, and eternally wonder-producing truth. Every day, I want breathe in the gospel reality that, "You make known to me the path of life; in Your presence there is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore." (Psalm 16:11 ESV)



Samuel, thank you for showing me, new life truths, in new ways. You are evidence of God's grace.



Your ababa (James)